


Blame it on the pills

by ffairyy



Category: GOT7
Genre: Fuckbuddies, Jinyoung is incredibly horny and thirsty for Mark, M/M, Markjin, Smut, canonverse, kinda fluffy and a lil bit angsty too?
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-10-31
Updated: 2017-01-15
Packaged: 2018-08-28 02:03:23
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 15,942
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8426641
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ffairyy/pseuds/ffairyy
Summary: Jinyoung starts taking protein boosters because he wants a better body.What he gets is a permanent boner and sexual frustration





	1. ONE

**Author's Note:**

> So markjin have their whole protein thing going on lately and I got inspired.......  
> also I need more fic where jinyoung is the thirsty one for a change :P

All Jinyoung wanted was a little support to get a better body. To define his biceps a little more and maybe his abs.  
Jinyoung was happy with his body, he worked out regularly and tried his best to eat healthily.  
He just needed a bit of a boost.

He had watched Mark taking his proteins for a while now and his biceps was already more defined.  
All Jinyoung wanted was some of that magic.  
Mark didn’t mind sharing, he never did. When Jinyoung needed something, wanted something ,he could always count on Mark.  
Yugyeom had told him once that he had Mark wrapped around his finger, but Jinyoung just laughed it off, even though he knew it was true.  
When Jinyoung needed something, Mark was the one who was there for him. He was the first one to treat him to a dinner or to buy him that perfume he saw at the airport. Jinyoung didn’t use that fact, he just didn’t hate it either. He knew he could count on him, but he never depended on him.  
The supplements weren’t exactly cheap either, but Mark didn’t even have to think about it when Jinyoung asked if he could try them.  
He just teased him a little because when Mark started taking them Jinyoung hadn’t approved.

“Isn’t that cheating?” he had said.

It wasn’t cheating. Protein boosters just supported what was already there. Jinyoung liked to think that they just brought out the best in him.  
And it was so difficult to keep up a healthy diet as an idol. Not with that working schedule and those sleeping patterns.

What he hadn’t thought about at all were possible side effects. Like the fact that it got harder to fall asleep every day, the fact that he had a weird kind of energy in his body late at night.  
And the fact that he basically had a permanent-erection. Not always in the same severity, but way too often nevertheless.  
It had only been a week on protein, but Jinyoung could already tell the difference. He could tell because he wasn’t one to get an erection that often. There was the stress of everyday idol life that got in the way, the fact that he usually just got home and fell into his bed after a long day.  
Apart from the occasional random boner on stage that he didn’t want to think about and the occasional morning wood, his libido was basically on an indefinite hiatus.  
So it didn’t take him long to realize that something had changed.

Jerking off in the dorm wasn’t always easy. Jinyoung had the privilege of a bit of privacy in his own room and god, he was grateful for that lately.  
It was after 11 days on protein that he read through the package insert and realized that yes, an increase in testosterone would most likely be to blame for his boners.  
But it wasn’t just the physical reaction; it was a mental one, too.  
To put it simply, he was always in the mood for it. His brain had taken a weirdly sexual turn and he wasn’t sure how to control it.  
The fantasies came in the most inappropriate situations, too.  
Like during fan-meetings.  
He couldn’t help it and he was glad that nobody could look into his head, but while he gave autographs and shook hands, his mind sometimes trailed off until he was nearly painfully hard in his pants and it took him all his concentration not to think about inappropriate things. Like Mark for example.  
Lots of Mark if he was being honest.

It wasn’t exactly new that he thought about him. Mark and him had a special connection and Jinyoung had always thought of him a little differently than of the other five.  
Had always thought of him a little too late at night and had always missed him in a not so brotherly way when he wasn’t there.  
Had even missed him when he sat right next to him and had suppressed the urges to get closer to him when they already sat too close.

Jinyoung had found ways to accept that, to make sure it wasn’t too suspicious and to control his thoughts, but all the damn wanting didn’t help.  
It was so difficult not to think of him when he touched himself. He couldn’t control it all the time, nor did he want to, when the thoughts of his Hyung made it so easy to get off.  
When thinking of Mark made it more exciting, too.  
It was things like his voice that drove him crazy and it was like his body was more vulnerable to those sensations now.  
Mark’s knee brushing his was enough to make an avalanche of inappropriate thoughts run over Jinyoung’s mind and he honestly hoped nobody saw him blushing during those moments.

He wondered how Mark did it. Wondered if the boosters had a similar effect on him and how he managed that. These kinda thoughts were exactly the kind he didn’t need.  
Just imagining Mark secretly jerking off in his bed made Jinyoung’s brain turn to pudding.  
He honestly thought about stopping the protein, but it just started to show its effects. When he stood in front of his mirror and flexed, his biceps was a little more visible, his abs slowly taking form. And every day he thought “just one more week and it’ll be enough”.

On a Friday evening Mark was up late and he was the last one left in the living room, watching shitty late night TV when Jinyoung searched for something edible in the fridge.  
He found a bit of leftover ice cream and decided that was exactly what he deserved after a busy week of promotion. Diets be damned.  
He sat down on the couch next to Mark and made sure not to sit too close.  
The ice cream helped a little to get a clearer head, but Mark’s presence was as infatuating as always.  
Jinyoung tried to concentrate on the strawberry taste in his mouth, but whenever he looked over he couldn’t help but let his eyes wander down Mark’s body.

“Hyung,” Jinyoung brought out and Mark looked over to him curiously, “do you have any side effects with the boosters?”

“Side effects?” Mark echoed, “I don’t think so … it’s harder to fall asleep, but it’s not that bad…why?”

“I was just curious,” Jinyoung mumbled.

“Do you have side effects?”

“Not really,” Jinyoung said, “It’s alright…”

Mark looked at him a little longer and Jinyoung acted like he was fully concentrated on eating his ice cream.  
“You’d tell me if something is wrong, right?” Mark said, “I don’t want to be at fault if it’s bad for your health.”

“Don’t worry about it, I’m old enough…”

Jinyoung felt the heat in all his body. He swore every single cell in his body felt the embarrassment.

He just hoped that his boner wasn’t visible, because he didn’t dare to check.  
And there was this neediness in his body again, taking over his every cell. Mark’s voice was just so sweet, even sounding as tired as it did and he wore Jinyoung’s favorite cologne. It was bad enough that Jinyoung could tell Mark’s colognes apart in the first place.  
This smell made him want to drop the ice cream and sink down before Mark and suck him off for hours. If only he could hear him moaning his name.

„Are they working for you?” Mark’s voice interrupted his thoughts. He needed to snap out of this.

“what?”

“The boosters… do they work for you?”  
  
“Uhm yeah, a little I think,” Jinyoung mumbled, “and you?”

“Yes,” Mark grinned, “wanna see?”  
  
Jinyoung cursed Mark and the damn protein and cursed himself when he nodded and felt himself twitching in his pants.  
He had to concentrate not to let a moan slip his tongue when Mark sat up on the couch, facing him properly now, and pulled his muscle shirt up.  
Jinyoung swallowed.

“See?” Mark smiled proudly.  
  
Jinyoung did see.  
He saw Mark’s slim waist and his torso, where the muscles looked a little more defined already and Mark flexed them and bent forward, trying to find the best pose to show off his body.  
And Jinyoung cursed the dim lights and the TV reflecting different colors on Mark’s skin and he cursed the way Mark had his shirt pulled up to his nipples, because honestly there was no reason for that. It was pure torture.

“Not bad, Hyung” Jinyoung hummed.  
  
“Right?” Mark pulled the shirt down again and Jinyoung felt his muscles relax. “Tell me when you’re making progress, too!”  
  
Jinyoung nodded. Dumbfounded.  
And then Mark stood up and stretched his arms for a moment, groaning as if moving hurt.

“I think I’m going to bed,” he said. “Goodnight Jinyoungie.”

Jinyoung resisted the urge to reach out and grab Mark’s sleeve, because he wasn’t that needy. Even though he was damn close to giving up the last bit of his pride.  
He watched Mark disappear into his and Youngjae’s room and sighed.

The TV was still on, the doors were all closed and he let his head fall back against the couch when he slipped a hand into his pants.  
This boy would be the death of him.

  
-

  
That night he dreamt of Mark.  
It wasn’t the first time he dreamt of him, but it was the first time he remembered everything in vivid detail when he woke up.  
Mark and him backstage after a concert.   
In a storage room.   
Mark taking him from behind, sweaty, raw and hard. One hand pressing into his arched back, the other holding his shirt bunched up around his neck.  
Jinyoung begging and begging for more and harder and please and people passing their room as if they couldn’t hear his whines.

It was one of those dreams that he wanted to crawl right back into when he woke up.   
At least right after waking up, his eyes still closed and his brain still fuzzy, his cock nearly painfully hard in his sweatpants, his heart racing from need and shame.  
It had felt so real and he wanted Mark like this. Just a little longer.  
Loved it.  
  
He loved the way Mark felt and the way he sounded and he loved begging for him. He wanted to live in that dream universe if it meant he could have him this way.  
But then he opened his eyes and remembered. That this was Mark he had been dreaming of. The guy he would have to be with all day. The boy who was also his bandmate.  
  
He needed to get him out of his mind before he lost control.  
Jinyoung always felt too damn close to losing his control around him.  
And it was so tempting to throw it over board.

-

Dance practice was a good way to relief some stress and to distract himself from his thoughts.  
It just really didn’t help that Mark was there with them, in the same room, in a muscle shirt and shorts and sweaty from the three rounds they'd already danced.  
Jinyoung tried and tried and tried but he couldn’t help looking at him and the images of sweaty Mark from his dream kept flashing up in his mind like little explosions of color and fire and lust.  
And dancing with a hard on was uncomfortable to say the least.

When they were done, all of the boys were breathing hard and sweating like crazy and it took them ten minutes of lying on the floor and panting and whining before the first ones made a run for the shower.  
Jinyoung was splayed out on the black leather sofa in the practice room and had his eyes closed. His head fallen aback against the wall and his face to the ceiling. He couldn’t get his breathing back to normal, his throat was dry from panting so hard and his muscles felt like jelly.  
  
He would be so sore tomorrow.  
His every bone already ached and if he tried to stand up right now his legs would probably fail him.

“Are you okay?” A voice startled him.

He quickly opened his eyes and saw Mark standing over him, looking down at him, panting with an exhausted smile. He looked just as exhausted as Jinyoung felt. His ash blond hair sticking to his sweaty forehead and dark wet patches on his muscle-shirt.

“I’ll live,” Jinyoung breathed.  
Mark let himself fall down on the couch next to Jinyoung and groaned.

“I feel like I’ve been hit by a truck,” he said, “but it will be so worth it.”  
  
Jinyoung turned his head towards Mark, still not able to lift it from the headrest of the couch.  
He regretted it though, because Mark was already looking at him and he had a curious spark in his eyes.

“Jinyoungie,” he murmured, “can I see yours?”

“What?” Jinyoung brought out.

“Your sixpack, can I see it?”

Jinyoung felt his heart racing and it was so hard to breathe and he wanted to say something, but instead he just nodded.  
Mark waited patiently for Jinyoung to show him, but he was like frozen, so Mark poked him in the side a little.

“Can I?” he asked.  
  
And Jinyoung nodded again, his heartbeat pulsing in his whole body and his chest heaving up and down.  
When he felt Mark’s fingers on the hem of his shirt he nearly exploded.  
Torture. Pure torture.  
  
Mark slid the fabric of the shirt up his body and like the day before he didn’t stop halfway. He had it up to Jinyoung’s nipples when he hummed in fascination.  
Then he let his other hand touch Jinyoung’s torso and feel over the muscles.  
Jinyoung wanted to scream, wanted to pull Mark on top of himself, the doubts be damned. Wanted to let the greediness take over his body. Wanted to let Mark do with him whateve-

“Jinyoungie,” Mark said. “You’re…hard.”

It took him a second to understand that Mark wasn’t talking about his abs.  
Jinyoung sat up quickly, pulling his shirt down again and pushing Mark’s hand away in the process.  
He felt the blood shoot into his head in record time and without thinking he pulled his shirt down further with both hands to hide his little problem from Mark.

“That’s not because of you,” he heard himself say, “that’s the boosters.”

Mark looked at him for a moment and Jinyoung noticed that his cheeks were painted in a light pink color, too. He bit his lips absentmindedly.

“Is that what you meant by side-effects?” he finally asked.

And Jinyoung sighed and relaxed a little. He let go off his shirt and leaned back into the couch again.

“I’m basically hard 24/7,” Jinyoung whined and hid his face behind his hands. “Don’t you dare laugh at me!”  
But Mark wasn’t laughing.  
He heard him swallowing and wanted to disappear into the earth’s core. Start a new life there.

“Oh.” Mark said.  
Oh.  
And then, “Well, tell me if you need something.”

Jinyoung stared at him and he wondered how it was possible for his head to feel even hotter. There couldn’t possibly be any blood left in his body, when it was all in his head and his cock, pulsing and torturing him.   
Making him feel a little dizzy.  
  
“Need something?” Jinyoung echoed, “like what?”  
  
“I don’t know. Anything. I could help you find different supplements,” Mark said, “they don’t work the same for everybody.”  
  
Jinyoung hummed. That was neither what he wanted, nor what he needed.  
Jinyoung needed Mark in the filthiest of ways and he knew that he shouldn’t even allow himself to think those things.  
  
-

Jinyoung lay awake that night.  
He should just get off those damn boosters already and get his damn pride and self-respect back. But something about it excited him in the core of his being. Something about this shift in his hormones, this change of mind made the days exciting, made the nights rewarding.  
  
It had something so relaxing and forbidden and arousing to lie on his futon late at night, when the rest of the dorm was asleep soundly, and relief himself.  
He listened to the Arctic Monkeys while jerking himself off and he thought of Mark.  
The moment he gave up fighting his thoughts and the moment he stopped being ashamed in front of himself, it became so satisfying.

The music was loud in his ears, only the light of a little purple heart shaped lamp in his room. A fan had given it to him a year ago and he used it exclusively when he was in that special mood. That desperate aching in his body and lewd thoughts in his head, images of Mark like a slideshow behind his closed lids.  
A hand wrapped around his shaft, the other pointlessly touching up his torso and over his nipples and whatever else he felt like touching. His back arched off the futon.  
It was nice to feel his body this way, he wouldn’t deny that.  
It would be even nicer if Mark was the one touching it.

His fingers were slick with precum and his hand moved fast, his mouth hanging open in a mute moan.  
  
“Mark hyung”, he whined so quietly, only he could even make out the words.  
  
When he came, he had his eyes closed, his heart racing, his cock twitching, imagining Mark was there between his legs, his plump lips wrapped around him and his rough voice humming praises while he came.

Jinyoung lay there for a few more minutes, completely blissed out, panting quietly, his chest heaving with heavy breaths, his hand and his thighs sticky. His tummy, too.  
After five minutes of nearly passing out from the satisfaction and sleep trying to reach for him, he got up and went to the bathroom to clean himself up with weak knees.

-  
  
When the weekend was there, all of the boys were exhausted. Jackson and Jaebum were knocked out in bed the moment they got home on Friday evening. Jinyoung didn’t see them coming out off their room all evening.  
Yugyeom and Bambam wasted some time arguing over who would get to shower first and „I’m gonna fall asleep if I don’t get this over with now.”  
Jinyoung didn’t think much of it when the two of them finally decided to share the shower so they could get into bed as soon as possible.  
Jinyoung wouldn’t be surprised if they shared a bed too, as Yugyeom and Bambam were basically joint at the hip.  
Youngjae was out of the dorm, sleeping over at a friend’s house and Mark was most definitely asleep on the living room sofa.

Jinyoung stood there in the doorframe and wondered why the universe hated him so much.  
Why did Mark look like that when he was sleeping? He hadn’t even gotten out of his practice clothes, his muscle shirt was hanging way out of place, revealing too much skin and one of his nipples and his hair all ruffled up from the dried sweat and from pushing it out of his face all day.  
Jinyoung would know; he was pretty sure he caught every time he did it and died a little every single time.  
One of Mark’s legs was hanging off the couch, the other lying on it loosely, his legs spread in a way that should be illegal.

Jinyoung hated himself.  
When had he fallen so deeply?  
He wasn’t usually the kind of guy to watch someone sleep and shamelessly stare at their body and he didn’t want to, but his eyes always were faster.  
And he couldn’t get the picture out of his mind anyway.  
He decided to be a friend though rather than a creep, so he walked to the couch and squatted down next to Mark’s head.

“Hyung, wake up,” he cooed. “You’re gonna catch a cold like this.”  
He took the freedom to pinch Mark’s shoulder a little and resisted the urge to stroke the hair out of his face. Even though his fingers itched to do it. He itched to lean over him, too.   
Maybe kiss him a little.   
Maybe a lot.

Mark wriggled around half awake, making little grunting noises that went straight to Jinyoung’s stomach and making the neediness take over his mind again.  
He needed him so badly. So so badly, he was gonna drown in it soon.

“Hyung,” he said again, a little louder. It needed so much discipline to wake him up at all instead of sitting there with him for an hour or two, just enjoying his presence and wallowing in wanting for a while.

But Mark opened his eyes, blinking away the sleep and adjusting to the dim lights. The only source of light was the one coming from the kitchen. The living room was shrouded in darkness.

“Jinyoungie,” Mark sighed with a husky voice. “What time is it?”

“Half past nine.”

“Urgh, I’m all stinky.” He screwed up his face while he leant up on his arms.  
Mark didn’t need to know what the musky smell on his body did to Jinyoung’s sanity, so he just smiled.

“A little.”

“I should go take a shower,” Mark groaned.

“You should.”  
  
It was about time for Jinyoung to stand up, so he did. He collected the pieces of his self-control off the floor and put them back in place, inside himself, where they belonged.  
The plan was simple.  
Going to his room, brushing his teeth and trying not to imagine Mark in the shower or anything to do with that.  
Then read a bit, maybe finger-fuck himself a bit and go the fuck to sleep.  
But Mark had different plans.  
When Jinyoung was just about to turn around and go to his room, Mark called out for him.

“I was wondering,” he stammered around. “Can I come to your room for a bit after my shower?

Jinyoung’s heart made a summersault, but his nerves threatened to kill him.

“Why?”

“It’s just that Youngjae’s not here and I don’t wanna be alone all evening,” Mark admitted.  
He was disgustingly attractive when he just said the things he thought. Jinyoung was so incredibly weak for Mark being honest; he just feared he couldn’t deal with this kind of honesty. If that boy only knew what he did to him. If he only knew what those words did.

“O-okay, sure,” he stuttered and Mark smiled at him. Then he heaved his exhausted body up from the couch and dragged it into the bathroom.  
And all Jinyoung could do was hope that he had enough time to jerk off quickly, so he wouldn’t have to be with Mark in this state.  
Even though he knew it would only be a temporary relief.

-  
  
Jinyoung sat on his futon, an alibi-book in his hand, even though he couldn’t even concentrate enough to read one line.  
He was still in a fuzzy state of after-jerk-off-bliss and he was already getting excited again. He couldn’t hear the water of the shower anymore, so Mark was most probably done.  
Jinyoung didn’t have any idea how to survive the evening, but he would find a way and if he was being honest, he’d rather suffer some frustration with Mark in his room than miss him all evening like he usually did.

He swallowed when he heard the footsteps, definitely barefoot. Mark exchanged a few words with Bambam and Yugyeom in the room next to Jinyoung’s and then he opened the door.  
And Jinyoung nearly cursed out loud.  
Mark might actually be sadistic, it was the only explanation.  
  
He stood in the doorframe, grey sweatpants on but more importantly no shirt. He had a towel hanging over his shoulder and a shirt in his hand.  
His hair was still wet and pushed back and his cheeks were all flushed from the shower.  
Jinyoung forced his eyes back to his book. Stared down as if the lines might hold answers to all of his questions.  
Question number one: How could this boy be so breathtaking and lethal at the same time?

“Are you showing off your abs, or…?”

“Am I that obvious?” Mark chuckled. “I thought I could pull this off…”

“Not really,” Jinyoung brought out and tried to ignore the way his whole body felt heated and overwhelmed. Mark closed the door behind himself and Jinyoung stole another glance before Mark pulled the black shirt over his head. Ruffling his wet hair up a little.

“These two are cute sometimes, not gonna lie,” Mark said and nodded back to the maknaes’ room. “I caught them all cuddled up, sharing headphones.”

“Yeah, they do that.”

“Jinyoungie,” Mark sighed. “Did I do something wrong?”

Jinyoung looked up into a worried face. Mark smiled a careful smile.

“No,” he said. “Why would you think that?”

“You’ve been weird with me lately,” he sat down on the futon next to Jinyoung and leant back against the wall, roughly drying his hair with the towel. “I asked Youngjae- he said so too.”

“The boosters,” Jinyoung mumbled. “It’s just that they make me weird…”  
  
“What do you mean?”

“I don’t know,” Jinyoung stumbled over his words. How should he ever get out of this?  
“Just…y’know… the testosterone…I ‘m so…my body is always….excited.”

“Oh,” Mark said and when he didn’t continue, Jinyoung dared to look over to him but he regretted it the second he did.  
Mark had abandoned the towel and was now looking at him with an unfamiliar glassiness in his eyes, and unfamiliar concentration in them, looking like he dared him.  
To do what?  
Jinyoung decided to look at his wet hair instead, and how little droplets landed on his shirt.  
“But you’re not weird with the others?” Mark asked. His voice was so raw.

Jinyoung’s heartbeat made him feel like fainting, made the control slip his grip slowly, but he didn’t try to hold onto it. Not when Mark’s voice sounded like that. Not when he looked at him with that spark in his eyes.  
  
“No,” he breathed. His hands moved on their own when he laid his book aside and Mark was moving closer.

“Good,” Mark said, “only think about me when you’re like this.”  
Jinyoung didn’t think it was possible to get this hard so quickly after coming earlier in the bathroom. But here he was, a heavy tingling between his thighs, the need growing in his bones.

“What do you-“

“I mean,” Mark repeated, “Only think of me when you’re all horny like this… like now.”

Jinyoung wasn’t sure if he wanted to run from the embarrassment or drown himself in it. The humiliation tasted so sweet on his tongue and it made his cock twitch again. The shame made his heart jump and his face feel hot.  
He had never ever heard Mark talk like this and not in his most delusional dreams would he have hoped to be the one who’d get to hear it.  
  
But Mark’s eyes were still on him, glanced down to his lips, then to his neck, down his body and onto his crotch.  
Jinyoung would’ve put good money on a bet that Mark was able to make him come undone by eye-fucking him like this.  
But he needed more.  
All his dams broke and it was like someone let him off a leash when he tugged on Mark’s sleeve like he always hoped he never would. He just couldn’t help himself anymore.  
“Hyung,” he whined. “I’m sorry I am like this…but I need you so bad…”  
He crawled closer until he kneeled right next to Mark and carefully cupped his face with his hands. Nearly shaking from need.

“Fuck, baby, it’s okay,” Mark hummed, closing his eyes for a short moment.  
Then he had his hands on Jinyoung’s hips and he pulled him onto his lap, not roughly, but determined. Jinyoung swallowed down a pathetic moan. He fit so perfectly into his lap and he settled down on Mark’s crotch harder than he intended.   
He resisted the urge to move his hips. He resisted embarrassing himself further.  
He didn’t wanna get too greedy too quickly- it was a miracle that this was happening at all.  
Maybe his prayers had been heard, even though he had moaned them into his pillow late at night with a hand in his pants.

“C’mere, tell me what you need,” Mark told him and his voice was dripping with care and wanting and the mixture was most definitely poisonous.  
His voice vibrated with arousal and Jinyoung inhaled that sound.  
  
“Is this okay?” Jinyoung brought out weakly, his voice nearly giving in, “isn’t this wrong?”

“I don’t care,” Mark breathed and then his lips were on Jinyoung’s neck and he sucked on his skin and Jinyoung nearly collapsed into his arms.  
Mark’s hands were so steady on his waist.

“What if anyone finds out-“

“I don’t care,” Mark repeated. “Tell me what you need.”

“You,” Jinyoung moaned and was shocked at how whiny it sounded. How desperate.

“I’m right here,” Mark reassured him and Jinyoung could feel the words like little electric shocks on his neck, close beneath his ear.  
Before he knew what he was doing, Jinyoung took his shirt off. Wriggled out of it and let it fall to the futon next to them.  
  
Jinyoung wasn’t strong enough to play hard to get- maybe he just wasn’t hard to get, but he didn’t care.  
He was so far gone and the heat was so unbearable and he wanted Mark to touch him.  
Everywhere.  
However he wanted.  
Mark just groaned in appreciation and sucked on his neck harder, pulling his body closer on top of himself. His hands sliding down Jinyoung’s body slowly.

“Fuck,” he breathed out, “you know how to make a guy feel wanted.”  
Jinyoung didn’t have it in him to tease, he didn’t have it in him to respond at all. He didn’t feel like waiting was an option.

“Hyung,” he whined, “kiss me properly.”  
Jinyoung took Mark’s chin and tilted his head up, so he could look at him. He knew he looked desperate most of all, but Mark wasn’t unaffected either. His eyes were so clouded by arousal, it would’ve made Jinyoung blush if he wasn’t already.  
  
Jinyoung was the one who finally brought their lips together and he couldn’t go slowly, couldn’t wait. Needed their tongues together like their bodies.  
  
He got carried away a little, sucking on Mark’s lips, on his tongue, licking into his mouth and biting his lips lightly whenever he had the chance to.  
Mark just let out little groans and let Jinyoung ravish his lips. He let Jinyoung wash over him like a wave, but Jinyoung didn’t miss how Mark’s hands found their way down to his ass, squeezing his cheeks, rubbing little circles on them.  
Jinyoung was so hypnotized from tasting Mark out that he didn’t realize he had started drawing circles with his hips, grinding down on Mark’s lap and letting Mark’s hands feel every move.

Another wave of need rolled over him, swirled him through deep waters, so while he was kissing Mark harder, his head already pressed back against the wall, Jinyoung started unbuckling his own belt, fumbling his fly open. Getting rid of the tightness of his jeans.  
He let go off Mark with a lewd wet noise of their tongues and Mark stared up at him with a hazy veil clouding his eyes.  
He looked lost for a moment when Jinyoung crawled off him.

Jinyoung stood up quickly, wriggled out of his jeans impatiently and was back in Mark’s lap in a heartbeat, without a word. With only his tight briefs on. He saw the hard bulge in Mark’s sweatpants and he was back to kissing him the next moment, back to grinding his ass down on him, now feeling it all too closely, but never close enough.  
Their kiss got steamier, hastier, Mark kissed back and finally seemed to lose a bit of his calmness, too.  
He pressed back into the kiss, managed to lift his head from the wall and push back against Jinyoung. Sucking hard on Jinyoung’s lips, making wet little sounds that went straight into Jinyoung’s bones, into his cock.  
It felt like a fight for control for a moment, but Jinyoung knew Mark didn’t fully try. Jinyoung’s need was stronger than anything else and he planned to get his satisfaction.

“Hyung, touch me,” he moaned. He grabbed one of Mark’s hands from his ass and led it to his crotch and he felt Mark twitching under him when he wrapped his fingers around his clothed length.

“Jinyoungie,” Mark groaned. “You’re so hot.”

Jinyoung felt a little explosion of tingles in his stomach and in his mind and his every cell.  
“So are you” His words melted out of his mouth like hot wax. He melted a little bit with them. Mark’s tenderness took some of the steam out of his body, but the need was still there.

“Take care of me,” he moaned, “please.”

He tugged on his own briefs until Mark got the hint and helped him wriggle out of them. Awkwardly. Jinyoung’s head leaning on Mark’s shoulder, steadying himself on Mark’s chest, until he had finally gotten rid of the last piece of fabric.  
It was strangely arousing to sit fully naked and fully hard in Mark’s lap, who still wore shirt and pants.  
His naked ass was rubbing over Mark’s sweatpants and he felt so exposed, like a deer in the headlights and he wouldn’t want to admit it but it turned him on to have all that attention on him.  
He needed it like he needed all of this.

Mark looked at him for a moment and then he didn’t wait any longer.  
With one hand wrapped around Jinyoung’s dick and one on his butt, he started kissing him again.  
Kissed his mouth sloppily but just when Jinyoung started to get greedy he pulled away slightly and smiled at him.  
  
But Jinyoung wasn’t having any of that- not in the state of desperation he was in- so he leaned forward, kneeled up over Mark and caught his lips between his teeth again.  
He couldn’t believe Mark would tease him like this when he needed him so badly.  
He couldn’t start pouting over it though, because Mark remembered that he had Jinyoung’s hard on in his hand and when he started stroking him slowly, Jinyoung felt himself pulsing.  
He licked into Mark’s mouth greedily, let their teeth click and then he kissed his way down Mark’s jaw and onto his neck.

Mark’s fist moved steadily, with a bit of sweet pressure and with his fingers slick from precum and Jinyoung’s body was on fire, but his brain melted until he had no control whatsoever over his words or actions. Or so it felt.  
He had his head buried in the nape of Mark’s shoulder as he arched his back into the touch and tried fucking into Mark’s fist.  
Jinyoung wriggled around in his lap and he shortly forgot that he was in the dorm with five other people, so he let out the moans the way they came.

“Jinyoungie,” Mark breathed while burying one hand in Jinyoung’s hair. “I hate to say this, but you need to be quieter.”

“m sorry,” Jinyoung moaned. The shame burned in his stomach like a hot iron, but the pleasure made him ignore it.  
The way Mark sped up his hand on his cock and the way he let his thumb roll over his tip had him gasping into his neck again.  
Moaning his name. Way too loudly.

“Shhhh,” Mark hushed him, but pumped his cock harder at the same time. Then he brought his hand up and laid it over Jinyoung’s mouth to silence him.  
Jinyoung arched his back and thrust into Mark’s fist again.  
Before he knew what he was doing, he opened his mouth instead and fished with his tongue for one, then two fingers, wrapping his lips around them.  
The shame and embarrassment were back and hot in his head and it all turned him on incredibly more than it should.  
It made him moan around Mark’s fingers and suck hard on them, swirling his tongue around them while Mark jerked him off.  
This time it was Mark who let an uncontrolled moan slip his throat.  
“Fuck,” he brought out weakly, “where’d you learn that?”

Jinyoung ignored him, because he was getting dangerously close to falling apart.  
He closed his eyes and let Mark slide his fingers in and out of his mouth, while he concentrated on the sensation between his legs. He was so desperate and so close. The tingling need made him want to scream.

“Fuck, I think I might come,” Mark moaned. He struggled and wriggled under Jinyoung, but didn’t stop stroking him.  
Jinyoung came before Mark could. He came with a muffled moan around Mark’s fingers, his hands clutching onto Mark’s shirt. He felt his legs shaking, his knees giving in, as he came all over Mark’s hand and shirt and he couldn’t even bother to open his eyes.  
Mark had to suppress moans, too. He let his fingers slip out of his mouth with a lewd pop and while his other hand gently kept stroking Jinyoung’s dick, he wrapped the other around his waist and pulled him closer to himself.  
Jinyoung had to stop his hand from moving, because he was so oversensitive.  
Mark pulled him close and Jinyoung’s lips were back to Mark’s neck.

“Did you too?” he murmured while sucking wet little kisses on Mark’s skin and while the tension and need slowly left his body and made place for comfortable exhaustion.

“Yeah,” Mark hummed.

“I’m sorry,” Jinyoung said, when his mind started to clear up again. “I didn’t do anything for you.”  
He kissed his way down to Mark’s collarbones and listened to Mark’s hard breathing.

“Believe me, you did,” Mark mumbled. “And I told you… if you need anything I’m here.”

“You didn’t think of something like this, right?”

“Maybe I did.”  
He brought Jinyoung’s head back up to his face and looked at him for a moment. A little bit unsure.  
“I want you more than you can imagine,” Mark admitted, a shy smile on his lips, a blush creeping onto his cheeks, “and I know this was because of the boosters and stuff… but I want you all the same without them.”  
  
Jinyoung looked at him and he could barely form a proper thought, but his arms tingled and his pulse was loud in his ears.  
He didn’t know what to say, because he was pretty sure Mark just told him that he wants him.  
Before he could say anything, Mark pulled him closer and his hands cupped Jinyoung’s face.

“Just wanted to let you know,” he smiled.

And then they kissed, a weak and careful kiss that felt a little too meaningful to be thrown in the same pile with the last 20 minutes.  
Jinyoung kissed Mark, but he couldn’t stop thinking of his words.

Did Mark know how serious such a statement was?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> me: *wants to write fuckbuddy markjin*  
> me: *accidentally makes it kinda angsty and overly romantic*
> 
> I'M SORRY OKAY


	2. TWO

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> listen........ I know I said this would be two chaps but it's gonna be three okay just roll with it pls

The thing about Mark’s confession was that Jinyoung really couldn’t tell what it meant and that he was too afraid to ask.  
Mark wanted him.  
What did that mean?  
Jinyoung wanted Mark, too. Had wanted him every single night for weeks, had wanted him every waking hour, had him in his mind all day long.  
But for Jinyoung it was the boosters, right?  
It was about hormones and wanting, and selfish, stupid wishes that needed to be fulfilled.  
It was about not having to be alone when the need took over him, right?  
But he would never in a million years want to do that with any of the other boys. He wouldn’t even get the idea, so why with Mark?

It had been two weeks since he said it and Jinyoung’s head was still spinning and while Mark didn’t seem to expect them to talk about it, Jinyoung wanted to at least understand.  
But understanding wasn’t a priority when he was with Mark and when they did what they did.

Like whenever they took a break during dance practice and the two of them sneaked into the basement of the JYP center and whenever Mark had Jinyoung pressed against the wall, kissing him hard and needy.  
Or all the times Mark sneaked over to Jinyoung’s room in the middle of the night, just so he could lie between his legs for an hour or two and let his mouth work wonders like he did.  
And Jinyoung couldn’t seem to get used to it.  
Every time Mark kissed him his brain melted and he didn’t learn how to keep his mouth shut either. Jinyoung never thought he was this vocal, but with Mark he felt like exploding if he didn’t let his moans out.  
In those moments he didn’t give a flying fuck about what Mark could’ve meant or that what they were doing was pretty high on the list of things they shouldn’t be doing. For several reasons.  
Jinyoung just loved the excitement and loved the intimacy and he would never admit how much he loved letting Mark worship him like this.

It was on a Wednesday night, a full day of promotion ahead of them, when he lay awake and stared at his phone.  
He shouldn’t do this again.  
He really shouldn’t.

 **J:** hyyyyuuung, it’s so dark in my room and I’m all alone…

He pressed send.  
The answer came half a minute later. Like always, Mark was there.

 **M:** poor baby. But you should sleep

 **J:** The boosters won’t let me  
**J:** I need you  
**J:** pleeeeaaase

 **M:** why are you like this

 **J:** shhh  
**J:** you love it

 **M:** fuck I do  
**M:** meet me in the bathroom

Jinyoung’s heart was racing when he tiptoed through the maknaes’ room. He knew Mark didn’t want to be the one to have to walk through it and Jinyoung wouldn’t argue tonight.  
Yugyeom and Bambam might be the youngest, but if they found out what’s going on, they’d never let them hear the end of it. They’d probably blackmail both of them and make Mark pay for every single dinner and abuse their power to tease Jinyoung even more than they already did.

So he tiptoed barefoot through their room and took his time to close the door to his room behind himself.  
The room was pitch-black and he could barely see where he was walking. Good thing that he knew this dorm like the back of his hand.

He could hear Bambam snoring silently and Yugyeom’s steady breathing. They were asleep soundly.  
But Yugyeom was a light sleeper and Jinyoung wouldn’t risk anything, so he took step by step, careful not to make any noises and not to step on one of Bambam’s shopping bags that lay around the beds.  
The door whined a little when he opened it, but it wasn’t enough to wake them and a moment later he had closed it behind himself and stood in the living room.  
Jinyoung took a deep breath and waited for his heart to calm down.

Then he walked towards the bathroom, where the door was already ajar.

“You didn’t wake them, did you?” Mark whispered and gently pulled him into the room. He closed the door behind them and locked it, too.  
They only turned on the little light over the mirror.

Mark wore grey sweatpants and a black shirt, a tighter one for a change and his blond bed-hair looked more golden in the dim light.  
Jinyoung felt the heat in his whole body now. He still couldn’t believe they did this. And not for the first time either.  
_I want you more than you can imagine._  
Mark’s words echoed in Jinyoung’s head and he felt a tingling sensation in his stomach.

“No, they sleep like babies,” he said, while he closed the distance between them. “Unlike me.”

“And unlike me,” Mark smiled, “thanks to you.”

“You want me, remember?” Jinyoung dared to say. He hadn’t brought this up a single time since Mark told him.

“Yeah,” Mark agreed and walked Jinyoung back against the door with a dull thump. “I really do.”

Jinyoung’s heart fluttered like the wings of a butterfly. His hands on Mark’s chest, he played with the fabric of his shirt and looked at him.  
Then he let his hands wander down Mark’s torso and over his stomach, down to the hem of his shirt, where they stopped.

“Hyung,” he whispered. “I can do whatever I want, right?”

“Right.” Mark smiled and bit his lips.  
So Jinyoung pulled Mark closer by his waistband and then he smoothly turned them around, so Mark’s back was pressed against the door.  
He looked at him curiously, his eyes glassy. Jinyoung loved that expression on his face, his soft features so incredibly easy to read. The arousal so prominent in them.

In those past weeks he had gotten to know Mark in all the ways he’d always wanted and yet there was so much more to explore.  
And some things hadn’t changed at all.  
Mark was still eager to please him whenever, wherever and however Jinyoung wanted and to give him whatever he needed and Jinyoung still needed him all the damn time.

Needed him close to him, needed his hands on him and needed to be wanted by him.  
He knew how Mark tasted by now, knew things he liked and started to understand which parts of them fit and which didn’t, but Jinyoung wanted more.  
As much as he loved it when Mark worshipped him, he desperately needed to make him feel good, too.

So he felt the excitement in his every fiber when he sank down to his knees in front of Mark on the cold bathroom floor.  
He swore he could see him blush up there, but the darkness made it difficult to be sure.

“Jinyoung, what-“

“I need this so much,” Jinyoung whined, while he pulled Mark’s sweatpants down and looked up at him with a tortured expression. “I couldn’t stop thinking about it all day.”

“Oh fuck.” Mark let his head fall back against the door, but Jinyoung was concentrated on what he wanted. And today he wanted to tease.  
So he tugged on Mark’s briefs, let his hands stroke over his thighs and up his stomach and he loved to let his fingertips feel over the little path of hair.

He could hear Mark’s unsteady breathing and that alone made him incredibly much harder and impatient. But he wanted to take his time because the time he had with Mark was always so rushed, so short and precious.  
In the middle of the night, when everyone else was asleep, he felt like they were alone on the planet and he wanted to enjoy that.

Jinyoung knelt there, playing with Mark and placing little wet kisses onto his stomach, while his hand sneaked into one of his leg holes and just barely brushed his cock and he heard Mark swallow.

“Jinyoungie-“ Mark groaned quietly and Jinyoung decided to have mercy on him, so he finally helped him out of his briefs.  
His cock was hard and flushed and there was precum waiting for him at the tip and Jinyoung remembered how much he needed this, how difficult it was to get theses picture out of his mind all day long.

And teasing was nice in theory, but he was a weak man, so he swallowed down a moan and licked the precum away, sucking the tip into his mouth and humming around it.  
It made him feel submissive in all the right ways and he wouldn’t wanna admit how sexy he felt on his knees.  
His cock twitched in his sweatpants and reminded him of how hard and desperate he was.  
But most of all he wanted to make it difficult for Mark to keep standing.

So he sucked his dick into his mouth and let his tongue feel over the veins and skin and he fucking loved the feeling.  
The little moans he teased out of Mark made his head feel dizzy and he finally gave up and sneaked a hand into his pants to stroke himself over his briefs. At least a little bit to not get rid of the worst tension.

“Hyung,” he hummed while placing little wet kisses down Mark’s shaft and to his balls and thighs, “have you ever gone all the way with a guy?”

He could hear Mark swallowing down a tortured groan.  
Jinyoung stroked them both in the same slow pace now, one hand in his pants and one wrapped around Mark’s length, too distracted by sucking dark patches onto Mark’s thighs.

“Maybe,” Mark brought out. “Why are you asking?”

Jinyoung stopped and looked up to Mark who looked illegally blissed out already.

“You know why,” he let his tongue click. “I wanna try it.”

Mark paused for a moment and then he reached down to Jinyoung’s face and made him stand up.  
Jinyoung let go of Mark’s dick and he felt it pressed against his sweatpants when they stood close together.

“You’ve never done it, right?”

“Right,” Jinyoung smiled and felt himself blush a little bit.  
The way Mark looked in this dim light with his cheeks rosy and his hair ruffled up and that damn low whispering voice of his- it nearly robbed him all his senses.  
He leant forward and kissed him, making him taste himself, making him groan in surprise and making him pull Jinyoung closer to his body.

Then Mark pulled away.

“We can’t do it now,” he breathed, “but we’re gonna… okay babe?”

Jinyoung melted a little and couldn’t resist the urge to let his hands wander down to touch Mark again.  
But that one had different plans.  
He kissed Jinyoung one more time, steamy and wet, but then he gently turned him around by his waist, so Jinyoung steadied himself on the door with his arms.  
His heart raced and the excitement went straight to his cock. He let out a mewl that was a tiny bit too loud for their circumstances, but Mark didn’t seem to mind.  
He came up closer behind him until Jinyoung could feel him pressed hard against his ass.

“Like this?”

“Yeah,” Jinyoung whined.

He felt Mark’s lips on the back of his neck and his hands wandered down his sides until they reached the waistband of Jinyoung’s sweats.  
It was nearly too much when he slowly stripped them down and let them hang somewhere around Jinyoung’s knees.  
Then his hand was at his front and finally stroked over his bulge, making him press into the touch.  
Jinyoung wondered if Mark had done this exact thing before, with another boy.

“You like me, right?” he heard himself ask. What was he doing? Those weren’t the words he should be saying right now. Those weren’t words he should ever be saying.

Mark just groaned against his neck and let his hand slip into Jinyoung’s briefs.  
“I like you a lot,” Mark whispered and his voice went right into Jinyoung’s bones. His head felt hot and he mindlessly pressed his hips back so he could feel Mark’s cock against him again.  
He swore if there was a safe way to do it right there and then, he’d be so ready. But for now he had to settle for the way Mark stroked him in his briefs and the way his hot breath felt on his neck.

“The boosters were the best idea we ever had,” Mark chuckled quietly.

“Yeah,” Jinyoung moaned, his eyes closed, his arms pressed against the door and Mark so close behind him.

Mark didn’t have to know that he hadn’t taken the damn boosters in over two weeks.  
As long as Mark wanted to have him like this and as long as Jinyoung was able to touch him however and whenever he wanted, he didn’t have to know.

-

  
They were in the middle of their comeback and Jinyoung needed every hour of sleep he could get. The boosters weren’t worth the damn side effects anymore and he just hoped he could somehow keep his body the way he wanted it.

His mind was exhausted from all the promotion and so was his body. The choreography was more demanding than anything they’d ever done and he didn’t even know how none of them had collapsed yet.  
Jaebum slept even more than usually, Jackson and Youngjae whined a lot and all of them were astounded by the maknaes' stamina, but even they just fell into their bed the moment they got home.

Sleep was their most important ally these days but Jinyoung would gladly sacrifice one or two hours of it, if that meant he could be with Mark.

He tried not to think about the fact that even without the boosters he was as needy as ever.  
Not just for any touches anymore, but for Mark’s touches.  
Touching himself wasn’t tempting when he knew how easy it was to persuade Mark to some sexy time.  
When he knew how good Mark’s hands felt on him. How good his fingers felt in his mouth or his head between his thighs, lips all stretched out and plump around him.

And he tried not to wonder where this whole thing should go.  
There was the option to stop and pretend it never happened, for the sake of their band and for the sake of their friendship- but was that really an option at this point?

Jinyoung couldn’t imagine an everyday life where Mark was out of reach. He couldn’t imagine them pretending that they hadn’t spent all these nights together, whispering all these things to each other, being so so so incredibly more vulnerable than he’d ever planned to be.  
But vulnerable felt good with Mark and it felt natural and safe and he couldn’t give that up. Whatever it was.  
It had to be okay. He couldn’t destroy it by asking questions.

Since the night in the bathroom he couldn’t get the idea out of his head that Mark would give him what he wanted most. That he would get to be even more vulnerable and even more intimate with him and the thought alone made his heart race.  
Jinyoung thought of it when they were on stage and in interviews and when they sat together with the other boys and watched TV.  
There was a silent agreement that they had to finish their promotions before taking any next steps and it helped that they basically fell asleep the moment they stepped into their rooms after every day.  
In the time during their comeback there were rushed blowjobs in dressing-rooms and sloppy kisses and whispered promises of “not here, okay?” and “soon, baby”.

A few days after their last showcase, Jinyoung woke up late in the evening and found himself spread out on the couch in their living room.  
His muscles felt sore and he was tired and the dried sweat on his body made him feel disgusting.  
He groaned when he sat up and everything hurt, but he had to get that damn shower. Maybe it would relax his tensed muscles a little.

He went by Mark and Youngjae’s room just to see if maybe Mark wanted to join him, but when he looked into their room they both were asleep, both of them still in full clothes.  
Jinyoung stood in the doorframe for a moment.  
It would be so nice to just lay down in Mark’s bed and cuddle close to him and fall back asleep, but he didn’t even let himself think that thought through.  
He knew he couldn’t.  
He knew it would most probably end in a disaster if they ever had to explain themselves to any of the other boys. Being reckless was only fun when there wasn’t the whole harmony of their band at stake.

And Jinyoung didn’t have to think twice about hiding what they had. He knew for some people two boys kissing was worse than anything else, even though he didn’t agree at all. Most of all he pitied people that were this narrow-minded.  
But that didn’t change the fact that it would turn into a big deal for the group and that was the last thing he wanted.  
All he wanted was to be with Mark in all those ways and more.

The water was hot on his skin, raining down on him in a steady downpour and it slowly washed away his thoughts and worries, too. Down his body and into the drain with all the shampoo and water.  
He had his eyes closed and his hand wrapped around his shaft and he thought of “soon, baby” and for a moment he wondered how it would be to share a room with Mark.  
The possibilities would be endless.  
No tiptoeing through other people’s rooms. No fear of Youngjae finding Mark’s empty bed in the middle of the night if he woke up.  
No clumsy lies about it in the morning.  
They probably even could’ve cuddled when they fell asleep. Bambam and Yugyeom did it all the time.  
Jinyoung knew that Youngjae and Jaebum used to do it too.  
No big deal.  
Just that they wouldn’t sleep. Jinyoung liked to imagine that they’d do everything but.

He was so lost in thoughts that he nearly missed the footsteps coming closer to the bathroom door.  
He paused for a moment, listening closely.  
“Who’s in there?” He heard Mark’s voice and his heart immediately sped up.

“I think Jinyoung,” Youngjae said.

Then they were quiet and so was Jinyoung. He held his breath and cursed the water for being so loud around him. Youngjae said something else, but Jinyoung couldn’t make out the words.  
And he nearly slipped on the floor when the door got opened a few moments later.

He stared and let go of his breath and of the shower curtain he had grabbed subconsciously, when he saw Mark rush in and close the door behind him.

“What the fuck?” he whispered.

“What?” Mark smiled. “Don’t you want me to join you?”

“Yeah, but,” he mumbled, “what about Youngjae?”

“He went back to our room.”

Mark was already stripping out of his clothes and Jinyoung couldn’t help but get a little distracted by watching him. He didn’t know how he got so lucky, but watching Mark pull his sweatshirt over his head and the way his hair stood in all directions afterwards- it was both endearing and incredibly attractive.  
Jinyoung couldn’t look at him without starting to feel needy.

“We need to be more careful, Hyung,” he mumbled, watching Mark strip out of his pants and swallowing when he saw the bulge in his briefs.  
His words got less convincing with every piece of fabric that fell to the floor.  
“What if Youngjae finds out…?”

“Then I tell him to keep it a secret.” Mark shrugged his shoulders. “I don’t think he’ll have a problem with it.”

Jinyoung sighed and gave up. Mark always managed to make him feel more at ease. How could he keep worrying, when this boy was getting in the shower with him right that moment? Pulling the shower-curtain close behind them and smiling the way he always did.  
Like everything would be alright.

“I missed you.” Mark stood there for a moment, taking the view of Jinyoung in and smiling more fondly than anything at his body and then right into his eyes.  
He stepped under the water with him and let it pour on his head, closing his eyes and running his hands through his wet hair. You could basically see the tension leave his body.  
Jinyoung watched him and caught himself smiling as well, his heart still racing.  
Everything would be alright.

It was Jinyoung who reached out and put his hands on Mark’s waist and gently pulled him closer.

“Imagine having our own room,” Jinyoung said quietly and Mark looked at him with a raised eyebrow.

“I wouldn’t get any sleep, would I?”

“Why would you want sleep when you can have me?”

“Very true,” Mark admitted.  
Jinyoung really couldn’t wait to just finally kiss him or just pull him closer and let the water pour down on both of them and to never stop touching him.  
But duty first.

“Turn around, Hyung,” he said and the way Mark looked at him with a raised eyebrow made him blush a little. “Don’t look at me like this, I’m just gonna wash your hair.”

“Oh,” Mark brought out, faking disappointment.

Jinyoung took the bottle of shampoo and squeezed a bit of it onto his hand. Mark had turned around obediently and waited for him to start.  
He spread the shampoo onto his hair and made sure to massage his scalp a little in the process. A bit of the foam trickled down Mark’s back and it made Jinyoung’s body even more excited.  
But what was he doing?  
Why was he washing Mark’s hair when he should be sucking him off or letting him play with his ass a little? Or a lot?  
Why did he have this urge and why was it so satisfying to care for him like this?

“Perfect,” Mark hummed. “You could be a masseur.”  
  
“Maybe I am,” Jinyoung said quietly. Distracted by his thoughts. What was he doing?

When he was done washing the shampoo out of Mark’s hair, he took the bottle of shower gel and put it into his hands.

“Relax,” he mumbled and couldn’t resist hugging Mark from behind and sucking a little kiss onto his shoulder.  
Mark nearly purred at the touch. His body must’ve been as tired as all of the boys’. He didn’t complain about it as much, but he had to be just as sore and tired as all of them.

And his body felt so good under Jinyoung’s hands. He put his arms around him to cover his torso in soap and his chest and down his sides and he stepped a little closer and Mark melted into his touch.  
So he rested his chin on Mark’s shoulder and let his hands slide down and brush against his erection.  
Mark let a little sigh out and tilted his head back to rest against Jinyoung.  
Jinyoung took him in his hands and covered his dick in soap as best as he could from behind.  
He felt so good, being pliant like this, and beside the neediness Jinyoung felt something else in his bones.  
Again. That damn need to care for him and make him feel good.

“You like that?” he heard himself ask and Mark hummed in pleasure.

So he stroked him a little sloppier, the soap making it easy to let his length slide in and out of his fist.  
Jinyoung’s heart was about to explode, the hotness of the water and the warmth in his body and the unbearable heat in his stomach were nearly too much. He was so hard and his cock was pressed against Mark’s back. He could feel him push back a little, too.  
When someone knocked at the door.

“Can I come in quickly,” Jackson’s voice said. “I forgot my face-mist.”

Jinyoung’s heart was about to jump out of his chest. Mark had completely frozen in front of him and Jinyoung still had his hand wrapped around his cock.  
Mark quickly reached out to pull the curtain a little further, so they were completely hidden.

“Uhm,” Jinyoung brought out. “Sure!”

He stood completely still, when the door opened and he could feel Mark’s chest heaving from breathing so hard. If Jackson listened closely he’d definitely hear their hearts beating.

“Also hurry a bit, Jinyoungie,” Jackson said while walking through the bathroom, the door probably wide open behind him. “Jaebum wants to shower, too.”

“Okay,” Jinyoung hurried to say.

In that moment, Mark wriggled out of his embrace and turned around carefully, looking at Jinyoung with curious eyes.  
Then he reached down between them and Jinyoung nearly moaned when Mark stepped closer and he felt his fingers curl around his cock.

“Fuck, where is this stupid thing?” he heard Jackson curse.

Mark had their dicks together now, his hands wrapped around both of them and Jinyoung could feel himself twitching against Mark.

“Uh,” he brought out, his voice shaky. “Maybe it’s in the living room. I- I think Bambam used it.”

He stared at Mark who bit his lips to suppress a moan himself and he felt the heat in all of his body, tingling in his cock and he wanted to explode.

“That brat,” Jackson sighed. „I told him not to use my stuff without asking.“  
He walked back through the small room and Jinyoung felt himself getting closer to his limits, Mark’s hand so merciless on them both.

“Okay, never mind,” Jackson finally said annoyed. ”But hurry up anyway.”

“Sure.”  
Then he heard the door close and let out a shaky moan, looking at Mark in disbelief.

That one looked back at him, his eyes so clouded from arousal and still panting.  
“Please,” Jinyoung brought out and pulled Mark closer to himself, their foreheads touching, and their chests moving quickly with every hasty breath they took. “Fuck me.”

“Not here,” Mark panted. “We need to prepare you.”

“Fuck,” Jinyoung moaned and dug his fingers into Mark’s arms, as if he’d fall otherwise. “I think I love you.”

Mark paused for a split second to look at Jinyoung. His eyes wide open, as if to make sure if he heard right.  
Then without a word he sped up his hand and it didn’t take much to make Jinyoung cum all over their wet bodies. He mewled quietly, trying so hard to keep the noise in.

Then, before he recovered from his high, he shoved Mark’s hands away and turned them around so he could lean back onto the wet tiles.  
He let himself sink down to the ground and moaned when Mark grabbed his hair gently to make him look up at him.

He looked down at him and Jinyoung felt the humiliation in his stomach.  
“Jinyoungie,” Mark brought out. “You mean it?”

“Yeah,” Jinyoung mumbled. “Now let me suck you off, idiot.”

Mark loosened his grip and stroked through Jinyoung’s wet hair instead, softly brushing it behind his ears.  
Jinyoung let his cock slide into his mouth and it tasted a bit soapy, but it was alright. There was this tingling in his stomach and the heat in his face from how ashamed he was.  
But it was alright.  
He meant every word.

Mark let out tiny grunts and Jinyoung let him fuck his mouth a little, before he helped him over the edge by jerking him off.  
He let him cum all over his face and he closed his eyes at the feeling, enjoying the way Mark’s thighs jerked in his grip and the little panting noises he let out.

He looked up at Mark and that one looked weak and overwhelmed.

“Shit,” Mark panted. “Look at you.”

Nobody should ever feel this proud with cum running down their face, but Jinyoung loved the way he made Mark look at him.  
All flustered and overwhelmed.  
“Jinyoung,” Mark said as soon as he had his breathing under control, “I love you, too.”  
  
-  
  
Jinyoung didn’t sleep at all that night.  
And for once it wasn’t because he and Mark kissed the night away or because they wasted their time sexting and sending lewd pictures to each other, despite being a few rooms apart.  
It wasn’t the kind of night that he enjoyed wasting.  
Jinyoung couldn’t stop thinking, thinking, over-thinking.  
He tossed and turned on his futon and he tried listening to music, but not even that helped.  
He should be happy, relieved, excited. And somewhere deep down he was, but there was this fear nagging at him, this big question mark.

Jinyoung hadn’t lied when he told Mark he loved him. He hadn’t thought about it like that before, but when he said the words, they tasted right. The moment they slipped his tongue, he knew they were true.  
And Mark felt the same.

Jinyoung should be unconditionally happy right now, but the insecurity swirled his feelings around in his stomach and made him a little seasick.  
Mark was so good at living in the moment and dealing with problems when, and only when they were right before him. He was great at going with the flow, too.  
Jinyoung not so much.

Not only did he need a plan, he usually needed plan A-Z to feel halfway secure.  
And he couldn’t trust this feeling of giddiness in his heart and the excitement and glee in his bones. Because what if someone found out? About what they did? About two boys not only kissing, but loving each other.  
Nobody could ever know, but what did that mean?  
Would they have to hide this whole thing forever?

Jinyoung turned to his side.  
He typed a few words into his phone and then he sent them to Mark, hoping he’d still be awake despite the time of the night.

 **J:** aren’t you scared at all?

The answer came quickly. Mark was awake.

 **M** : a little… can’t you sleep?

 **J:** no  
**J:** i’m scared this won’t work out

Jinyoung felt the lump in his throat as he typed the words.  
He would not start crying in the middle of the night in his dark room. No way.

 **M:** we’ll make it work  
**M** : idk how but we’ll figure it out

Now a single tear found its way out of Jinyoung’s eye and rolled down his cheeks.  
Then his phone buzzed again.

 **M:** I love you

Jinyoung took a deep breath and pressed the phone to his chest. His heart fluttered and the lump in his throat lost a little of its weight.  
It would be alright.

 **J:** I love you too


	3. THREE

  
The dorm was quiet during the days after their promotion ended. Yugyeom slept at his parents’ house a lot and Jackson and Bambam were out and about with solo schedules. Youngjae spent his days and sometimes nights gaming in the living room and Jaebum was asleep whenever Jinyoung saw him. He could sleep in the weirdest places and Jinyoung wondered how he still seemed tired when he was awake.  
  
None of them even noticed that Mark wasn’t in his own room most of the time. That sometimes he was in Jinyoung’s room, watching videos on Youtube, with headphones, so he wouldn’t distract Jinyoung from the book he read.  
Sometimes they watched movies together, sometimes even all the way through without getting too distracted by each other.

Jinyoung was more than prepared.  
He had read through every single ass-related article he could find on the internet. Had been in every anal sex forum he could find and got a bunch of information he never thought he needed.  
  
He had practiced, too.  
Park Jinyoung would not be an amateur when he had this kind of sex for the first time. There was no way to get his hands on a dildo and holy shit what if someone found it in the dorm. But two fingers just weren’t enough anymore and three were just unpractical thankyouverymuch.  
A medium sized empty hairspray bottle, some lube and a condom had to do the job.  
  
There was no reason to be picky anymore when he was fucking himself with it late at night in his small room, lying on his back and watching himself in his large mirror front.  
A good way to practice swallowing down his moans too.  
Even though he hadn’t performed for a few days, he still felt a slight soreness in his thighs, but that didn’t stop him from spreading his legs further to get the friction were he needed it most.  
  
He wondered if Mark ever did it like this. And if it made him cum as hard as Jinyoung.  
Some day he wanted to try that out, too. Having Mark at his mercy.  
For now he decided to just send him a blurry picture of himself, face hot and fingers in his mouth, sucking cum off them and the words “soon?” on the picture.  
Mark’s answer consisted of three blushing smileys and a short message.  
  
**M:** if my boy says so!!  
**M:** but why r u getting me hard already?

  
**J:** ooops :)))  
  
Jinyoung smiled stupidly and decided to go to sleep, right after cleaning himself up.

 

♥

 

A few days later it was Mark’s birthday.  
They all went out to eat together in their regular restaurant that they always visited on special occasions. This time they even booked the whole location, because they also used the day to celebrate their win with their comeback, so when the sun was setting and the streets got dark, there were around 30 people in the restaurant and little groups had formed.  
There were friends and family of the boys and some of their staff and the mood was light and carefree, if not because of the successful wrapped up promotion or Mark’s birthday then because most of them were on their second or third drink.  
  
Jinyoung sat somewhere at the biggest table in the room, jammed between Mark on one side and Jungkook on the other. Yugyeom and Jungkook were lost in a heated conversation over some new girlgroup and Jackson was in the midst of a story about their America Adventures as he called them. Grossly exaggerated of course; but everyone seemed highly entertained and Jinyoung couldn’t stop himself from laughing along.  
  
In all that noise and swarming it didn’t stand out that his hand had lain on Mark’s thigh for the past ten minutes, gently stroking over his black jeans.  
Jinyoung wasn’t a lightweight. He had a bit of experience with alcohol and he hadn’t drunk any more of the beer than anyone else, but he’d downed them on an empty stomach and that was never a good idea.  
But Jinyoung had a plan and eating wasn’t compatible with it.  
  
“Where are you going?” Mark wanted to know when Jinyoung had stood up a little too abruptly, his motions already slightly out of control.  
  
“Bathroom,” he said and when he took the first few steps the room started to sway around him and he walked carefully, but the floor just didn’t want to cooperate.  
  
He was a good actor though, so nobody had to notice how much effort it took him to get to the bathroom without tripping.  
He successfully emptied his bladder and was proud of actually peeing into the urinal instead of anywhere else, so he went to wash his hands.  
The bathroom was noble, velvet red walls with pretty black ornaments on them and dim lights, marble sinks.  
  
He looked at his reflection in the mirror and forced his eyes to focus again. He had prepared for the worst, but the golden lights over the mirrors actually made him look like a hot mess and he smiled at the bit of eye-shadow that had stayed in place perfectly all evening- just as Bambam had promised.  
He wondered if it would be very selfish if he asked Mark to leave the party early- it was his birthday after all-but they’d been there for hours.  
Just when Jinyoung wanted to shake the thought out of his head, the door opened and a rush of excitement flooded through him when he saw Mark closing it behind himself.

“You okay?”  
Mark came over to Jinyoung and looked at him through the mirror.  
  
“I’m so okay,” Jinyoung smiled, “how ‘bout you?”  
  
“Very okay,” Mark nodded. “There’s just too many people.”  
  
He stepped closer behind Jinyoung and that one watched his every move in the mirrors. When Mark’s hands found their way around Jinyoung’s waist, he let his head fall back against him.  
  
“How drunk are you, Jinyoungie?” he purred.  
  
“Like… half past tipsy,” he said. “You?”  
  
“Me too.” Mark buried his face in the nape of Jinyoung’s shoulder and placed little butterfly kisses on his neck. “Tipsy enough that I might kiss you in front of everyone if we stay.”

“We don’t want that,” Jinyoung breathed. He could feel heat pooling in his stomach and his heart already pumped faster.  
Mark’s hands slid down his sides as he walked him forwards a step, so Jinyoung’s front was pressed against the sink and he nearly let a moan slip. He steadied himself on the cold marble.  
He couldn’t believe how hot it made him to see Mark like this, all daring and greedy. He was already so hard for him and not even the bit of alcohol changed that. It had just made him lose his shame somewhere on the way, not that he had much to begin with.  
Jinyoung stared at himself in the mirror and felt incredibly sexy with the way Mark kissed up his neck and sucked on the skin behind his ears.  
  
He nearly forgot where they were when he started pushing back into the touch and he heard Mark swallowing down a moan. He could feel his semi pressed against him and it made him a little weak in the knees.  
  
“If we sneak back home now we have the dorm to ourselves,” Mark whispered as if he had to persuade Jinyoung to accept. He was more than happy to leave, but he also couldn’t just agree and miss the chance to tease Mark a tiny little bit.  
  
“Why?” he asked innocently and turned around so he could face Mark and lean back against the sink. “To do what?”  
  
Mark looked at him and his glance fell down to Jinyoung’s lips for a split second, but he didn’t let him fluster him that easily anymore. He had gotten to know Jinyoung’s ways of teasing and knew how to play along.  
  
“Oh, whatever you want, princess.” He grinned and Jinyoung didn’t protest when he lifted him up by the hips and sat him down on the edge of the sink.  
Mark’s hands were on Jinyoung’s thighs in a second, stroking over them determined, just to spread them open, so he could stand between them. Jinyoung hummed in appreciation.  
Maybe Mark wasn’t as sober as he acted either.  
  
“I have something in mind,” Jinyoung smiled, when he wrapped his arms around Mark and pulled him closer by his neck, feeling his hot breath on his skin. “It’s your birthday after all.”

“Oh?” Mark breathed and leaned forward to peck on Jinyoung’s lips quickly, making him ache for more. ”A present?”  
  
“Something like that.” Jinyoung hummed and pulled Mark closer. He was done with the teasing. If there wasn’t half Seoul in the restaurant he’d be more than okay with Mark bending him over the sink and making him watch himself. But that wasn’t a risk he was willing to take, especially not when he couldn’t trust his intoxicated brain. And no matter how hot Mark made him, this wasn’t the way their first time should be. He had different plans.  
  
With Mark’s hands stroking up and down his thighs and his hot breath on his neck it was difficult to not get weak and whine for more.  
Jinyoung pulled him closer to get a proper kiss and he wasn’t sure if it was Mark’s tongue or the alcohol in his bloodstream that made his head spin a little when they kissed.  
  
“Let’s get out of here.” Mark smiled when they parted.

  
♥  
  
When they arrived at the dorm, Jinyoung’s head was a little clearer, but his whole body ached for Mark and he couldn’t help the smile on his face when he watched Mark opening the door and letting them into a completely empty flat.  
The other boys were still busy drinking and laughing in the restaurant and they barely noticed them leaving.  
  
As soon as Jinyoung closed the door behind them he started chuckling.  
  
“What’s so funny?” Mark wanted to know, pinching Jinyoung’s side and making him jump away from him.  
  
“I don’t know” he smiled. “It’s just nice being alone with you.”  
  
“Urgh, you get so cheesy when you’re drunk.”  
  
Mark pinched him again and when Jinyoung tried to escape, he held him by his waist and pulled him closer to himself.  
Jinyoung took the chance to kiss him and their teeth clicked together because they were both smiling.  
  
“Give me five minutes, Hyung,” Jinyoung cooed.  
  
He sneaked into the bathroom and couldn’t help his stupid grin when he looked into the mirror. He still looked like a hot mess and the excitement made his skin tingle.  
He wriggled out of his clothes and jumped in the shower quickly.  
Jinyoung didn’t wash his hair; he just enjoyed the warm water for a moment and grabbed some coconut oil.  
Jinyoung had some practice by now. Knew how to prepare himself and knew how good it felt to be filled up by a finger or two. Or more.  
He wanted to make sure he was cleaned up and ready for Mark.     
  
  
When he walked back into his room in only his briefs and a shirt, Mark was already lying on his bed and looked up at him curiously.  
  
Jinyoung smiled and he saw Mark’s glance to the coconut oil in his hand. Jinyoung laid it aside.  
  
“I missed you,” Mark pouted.  
  
“Aww babe,” Jinyoung smiled. “I’m sorry I let you wait.”  
  
“Then c’mere now.”  
  
Jinyoung let himself fall onto the bed and was caught in Mark’s arms.  
With their legs and arms tangled they rolled around and Jinyoung remembered how excited he was. He could still feel a bit of the beer making him lightheaded, but it was mostly Mark’s smell and his warmth that made his heart beat faster.  
  
When Mark lay on his back, Jinyoung took his chance to sit down on him and grab his hands. He tangled his fingers with Marks and slightly pressed them into the mattress on their sides.  
  
“I didn’t wanna spend money,” Jinyoung grinned. “So your present is me.”  
  
Mark raised an eyebrow and licked his lips, thinking of something to answer.  
  
“I was hoping you’d say that to be honest.”  
  
Jinyoung leaned down to kiss Mark’s neck and then the edge of his mouth. He breathed a little butterfly kiss on the mole above his lips, a habit he couldn’t let go off.  
When Mark was about to kiss back, he pulled away slightly and tightened his grip on his hands. He readjusted his hands so they were holding Mark’s wrists instead and that little action didn’t go unnoticed by him.  
He could feel Mark twitch under him and it brought his whole attention to how hard he was getting.  
  
“Oh,” Jinyoung teased. “I didn’t know you like being dominated.”  
  
Mark looked away, a rosy blush on his cheeks.  
“I didn’t know either.”  
  
Jinyoung smiled and started circling his hips on Mark, making him feel every movement. He wasn’t unaware of how visible his cock was in his briefs. Maybe he even chose the tightest ones he owned.  
His goal was to see Mark fall apart under him and he was more than confident that he could make that happen. Maybe quicker than he thought when he watched Mark blush like that.  
  
“Keep your hands to yourself,” Jinyoung said, when he let go off them and Mark did as he was told. His hands lay on his sides weakly and he just watched how Jinyoung kept moving on him, drawing circles and rubbing over his sweatpants.  
Jinyoung knew that Mark was watching when he let his fingers slide under his own shirt and let the fabric slide up a little.  
He didn’t stop moving his hips when he slowly pulled his shirt up and over his head.

Mark just swallowed and wriggled slightly under Jinyoung.  
In nothing but his briefs, Jinyoung kept dancing, even closing his eyes and feeling Mark’s hard on rub against his ass.  
He let a moan slip his tongue and Mark answered with a tiny tortured groan.  
  
“You look so perfect right now,” he brought out.  
  
“Yeah?” Jinyoung hummed, pressing his thighs down harder.  
  
“Yeah,” Mark moaned. “Can I touch you?”  
  
“Mhh,” Jinyoung hummed. “Not yet.”  
  
He stopped moving and sat down on Mark’s side instead, helping him out of his sweatpants and gently putting his hands away whenever he tried touching Jinyoung.  
Mark was visibly getting more impatient with the second and Jinyoung enjoyed seeing him like that, but his own neediness was nearly unbearable at this point.  
His cock was leaking precum and a little wet patch had built on his grey briefs and he hoped Mark saw it too.  
  
“Hyung,” Jinyoung then purred. He leaned down over Mark and kissed him, on his lips this time, tucking on them and licking into his mouth slightly. “You’re sobered up, right?”  
  
“Right.” Mark smiled a curious smile. “Why?”  
  
Jinyoung bit his lips in thoughts, circling his hips a little and one hand absentmindedly found its way to his bulge, stroking himself a little. He only realized he was doing it when he saw Mark watching him.  
  
“I wanna try today,” he then said, sounding shier than he felt.  
  
Mark leant up on his elbows and looked at him, a spark in his eyes that could mean anything.  
  
“You sure?” he asked. “But not just ‘cause it’s my birthday, right?”

  
Jinyoung let his tongue click and gently pushed Mark back down into the mattress.  
 If that boy knew how difficult it had been to wait for this day.  
He had been fucking himself so many times at the thought of it, sometimes in the shower, sometimes in the darkness of his room. Sometimes when the whole dorm was asleep and sometimes when Mark was sexting him late at night and had no idea that he came twice as hard when he fingered himself.  
He wasn’t just ready; he was overdue.  
  
“So you want it?”  
  
“Fuck yeah” Mark breathed out. “So much.”  
  
Jinyoung saw that as his cue to get going and he gladly did. He wriggled out of his briefs and his stomach tingled when he saw Mark’s glance falling down and eating him up with his eyes.  
Then he leaned down again to kiss him properly, arching his back and lifting his ass up and the tingling spread through his whole body.  
With one hand on Mark’s clothed cock and one steadying himself beside his head, he tucked on his lips, catching them between his teeth and listened to Mark’s unsteady breathing.  
He could feel Mark bucking up his hips and smiled into the kiss.  
  
“Eager, are we?” he grinned.  
  
Mark just hummed and reached up to hold Jinyoung’s waist, feeling over his curves and Jinyoung gladly let him.  
Mark was so hard in his hand and he could feel him twitching whenever he let his fingers curl around his tip.  
When Mark started letting out little grunts of pleasure Jinyoung deemed him ready and helped him out of his briefs.

With no more fabric separating them he grinded down on his cock, feeling his hot skin under him and closing his eyes to fully enjoy the sensation. It was difficult to keep teasing when he was so ready to just finally try.  
But his birthday boy deserved the whole show, teasing inclusive.  
His sight got a little unclear when he sat up too quickly but it just added to the whole excitement and the next moment Jinyoung found himself lying between Mark’s legs, spreading them open just because he could, and teasing his tip with his tongue. There was precum waiting for him and the taste was strong and it was exactly what he needed.  
  
He sucked and kissed on him and it was a little sloppier than usually because Jinyoung was impatient, but Mark’s little whimpers told him that he liked it just like that.  
Jinyoung only let him out of his mouth to stand up and search for a condom and their little bottle of lube and the sight of Mark lying on his bed, abandoned and so hard- it made him crawl back onto the bed embarrassingly fast.  
  
When he started sucking Mark’s cock again, he had one hand grabbing his thighs and digging his fingers into his flesh and the other circling his lubed up fingers on his own hole.  
He could hear Mark breathing out little curses and short breaths, but he was too concentrated on teasing himself loose and letting a finger slip into himself.

He tried his best to keep up his work on Mark’s dick, but he couldn’t help but stop again and again, whenever the pleasure got too much and his greediness too big.  
  
“Can I,” Mark panted, “Can I do that for you?”  
  
Jinyoung just hummed around his cock and quickly readjusted himself, so he was sitting on Mark’s stomach, his back towards him, handing the lube to him.  
  
And when he started licking and kissing his length again, it was Mark’s fingers he felt on his hole and that was the moment he decided to let the moans come however they wanted.  
Mark was so careful. Too careful and too good and Jinyoung started whining, when he felt his slim finger slide into him and he let his tongue swirl around Mark’s tip and took him in so far, he nearly choked himself.  
  
“Jesus,” Mark panted, while he added a second finger and it slid in beside the first one way too easily. “How often have you done this without me?”  
  
Jinyoung moaned and let him slip out of his mouth, before he could answer.  
  
“Too often.” He tried to make it sound by the way, but he just ended up sounding whiney and needy.  
  
Mark added more lube and a few minutes later he had three fingers in him and Jinyoung rocked back and forth on them greedily, all lightheaded and ready.  
  
“Okay,” he panted, out of breath from all the sensations, “Just let me…now”  
  
A moment later he was rolling the condom onto Mark’s length and lubed him up, making him jerk slightly under him.  
Then he found himself kneeling over him and his heart was racing when he felt his tip press into him.  
Mark lay there still and patient, just letting his hands explore Jinyoung’s body, while that one slowly let himself sink down on him and it felt so so much better than everything he had tried over the past weeks.  
His moan came out shaky and loud when he was finally sat on Mark and was so filled up he needed a moment to catch his breath.  
  
“Oh fuck,” he whined, “oh fuck, oh fuck….“  
  
Jinyoung kept whimpering little incoherent words and phrases while he slowly started moving and the friction was so sweet and when he opened his eyes he saw that Mark’s were closed and his mouth open and he was breathing heavily.  
  
“Good?” Jinyoung brought out, not able to form proper sentences.  
  
“God,” Mark groaned, “yeah.”  
  
Mark’s hands had Jinyoung’s ass cupped and he spread his cheeks slightly and it turned Jinyoung on illegally.  
He readjusted himself slightly and moved faster, arching his back and rolling his hips on him, feeling Mark slide in and out of him. He had to close his eyes again and listened to the wet sounds and the way his thighs met Mark’s every time he sank down extra hard.  
  
He heard the tortured groans Mark couldn’t hold back and he loved the way Mark couldn’t get enough of touching him, so his hands wandered from his ass up his waist and grabbed on his flesh wherever he could. Then he felt one of his hands rub over his leaking cock and it forced a loud whine out of Jinyoung.  
  
“Touch me,” he whined, not caring about his voice breaking slightly, “please!”  
  
And when Mark’s hand curled around his dick, he clenched around him and his mouth was hanging open in pleasure.  
But his knees already felt weak and his thighs started to hurt and it was getting harder to move and when Mark started stroking his cock he stopped bouncing on him wholly and just kept rolling his hips weakly.

That was when Mark sat up and rolled them around, slipping out of Jinyoung and placing him carefully on his back, before he knelt down between his legs.  
  
“Like this?” he asked softly, still out of breath and Jinyoung could just nod eagerly. He was so close already and his body felt tingly and buzzing and he watched Mark adjusting himself between his thighs and grabbing his legs to hold them up.

And when he slowly filled him up again, Jinyoung’s mouth was hanging open in a mute whine. He grabbed the sheets for support and closed his eyes and the itch in the pit of his stomach was nearly overwhelming.  
But then Mark started moving and it was faster and sloppier than before and a little harder, too.

The noises were lewd and wet and every time Mark pushed into him, he pushed the breath out of Jinyoung until that one was moaning uncontrollably, begging him to go harder.  
When he was extremely close to the edge, he opened his eyes and lifted his head slightly to watch Mark, who reached down for Jinyoung’s dick and stroked it messily.  
His skin was shiny in the dim lights and his expression tortured and Jinyoung could see his muscles move when he fucked him to his climax.  
  
His whines were loud, accompanied by Mark’s strained grunts and he came all over his stomach and over Mark’s hand and fell back into the pillow, his back arched and his heart skipping a beat.  
His thighs shaking.  
 But Mark kept going mercilessly, even speeding up and Jinyoung watched him through half lidded eyes as he moaned and thrusted a few last time, before he came and Jinyoung could feel his fingers digging into his thighs.  
The noises of their panting mixed together were the only thing that filled the room and when Mark slipped out of him, Jinyoung had his eyes closed and enjoyed how the aftermath of pleasure took him and swirled him around.  
He could only assume that Mark was getting rid of the condom and falling down onto the bed beside him and he felt his arms lazily wrapped around him the next moment.  
  
“I love you,” Mark whispered, exhaustion and raw emotion in his tone.  
Jinyoung couldn’t help the huge smile that grew on his face and he blindly searched for Mark’s chest and stroked over it absentmindedly.  
  
“I love you, too.” He sighed. “So much.”  
  
In that moment and with his head being as light as a feather and his body spent and satisfied, those words were the truest thing he knew and the only thing that mattered was Mark’s warmth and the fluttery heartbeat Jinyoung felt when he touched his chest and their slightly sweaty bodies next to each other and their breathing that slowed down- nearly in sync.

“Hyung,” Jinyoung whispered after a while, his heart beating faster again, “I’m not taking my proteins anymore. This is no side effect…this is all you.”  
  
Mark only chuckled quietly and pulled Jinyoung closer to himself.  
  
“I figured,” he smiled against his shoulder. “I’m keeping track of them.”  
  
“But you still take yours?” Jinyoung wanted to know, anxiety creeping into his body.  
  
“Yeah, but…” Mark leant up on his elbow and looked down to him, “Jinyoungie… it was never the pills for me. It’s all you…always has been.”

♥

**Author's Note:**

> me: *wants to write fuckbuddy markjin*  
> me: *accidentally makes it kinda angsty and overly romantic*
> 
> I'M SORRY OKAY


End file.
